Lean Green Self-Esteem Machine

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I’m…cool, right? I’m awesome? I’m talented? I’m a good person? I’m successful? I’m attractive? No! I’m a loser. I’m weird. I’m awkward. I’m boring. I’m normal. I’m selfish. I’m lazy. I’m odd looking. I’m not special. Ok you get the point. Self-esteem is like a muscle, you need to keep working on it before you see definition. Very few people are born with a “ripped” image of themselves.

The way we feel about ourselves is a delicate matter. It’s like walking a tight rope. I know it’s an old cliché, but it’s true. Some days the rope feels 2 feet wide and we can walk straight ahead without even thinking of looking down. And other days all we can think about is not looking down. I personally have had a long up and down battle with myself. And he keeps winning. But don’t tell anyone, I don’t want people to think I’m not cool. But it’s seriously insane how often I wake up feeling like a different person. One day I think I’m so handsome and clever, and the next I’m a foolish troll. It can really drive a person bonkers. You try to tell yourself on those bad days that you’ll feel different tomorrow, but it’s easier said than done. But the worst has to be those days where you feel like a million bucks (maybe 10 million because a million isn’t that much these days) and one thing happens or someone says something that triggers that self-unworthy voice to re-emerge. Why can’t I get a grasp on myself?
The main fuels for low self-esteem are guilt and envy. We are always punishing ourselves for bad things we’ve done or things we have not done but feel we should have done. We tend to look at other’s highlight reels and compare them to our feature length films. This makes us feel part of an unaccomplished minority, which is far from the truth. It’s just a narrative that exists solely in our heads. We tend to see ourselves the way we think others see us. So I try to find time every day to workout in my mental gym to change that vision.
“We tend to see ourselves the way we think others see us.”
The simple fact is that everyone wants to be validated and understood. Remember when we needed our parent’s validation as little kids? Remember when we felt incredibly misunderstood as angsty teenagers? Those were when we were at our most delicate stages of self-growth. You’d think we’d be over that junk by now. But it’s an ongoing clash of good you vs. evil you, and the best way to keep that warrior battle ready is to change that narrative inside. By understanding and becoming at peace with who and what you are you’ll find the self-validation comes much easier. Your energy will change, you will open up, and suddenly those around you will start to appreciate you too. Alright!!! Enough of this deep mushy stuff. I’m an awesome talented self-esteem machine and all that matters is that I know it.
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